Monday, March 22, 2010

A note from the field...

So much is happening, inside of me and outside, that's it's hard to digest it all. For starters, about three weeks ago my car died, the transmission gave out and with 249,000 miles on a car with a bad front end it just wasn't feasible to get it fixed. My son has one car, which he needs to get to work, my daughter has another (work and college) so my wife and I share hers. I drive it some days and other days I get a ride into work and catch a ride home with one of my co-workers. Things have worked out, mostly, and let me tell you, it is a humbling experience to ask others for a ride. So Franciscan! Almost like asking for alms. I wish we had better public transportation, I'd forgo another car altogether. H and I had grandiose ideas of re-financing our home and getting a newer used car that way but even going that route would have cost us a ton of money we don't have. So down one car has been a two sided coin; inconvenient in some ways but eye-opening in others. H and I talk about cutting back and in our semi poverty existence we're forced to not have much. My paycheck is pulled in many different directions, spread like the last of butter on many pieces of toast. But we were called to be Secular Franciscans and by the grace of God we will act like one in prayer, thought and actions.
Also, I'm finding that the noise of the world is unsettling at times, and I'm not sure if it's only because of Lent or God has manifested Himself in me in another new way. Mostly, though, I believe it has to do a lot with reading Sacred Scripture, which lately what I've been reading has really clicked in me. God and his works are to me a tremendous mystery that I'll never even begin to understand. God's ways are not our ways and to understand them completly is, for me, not important. I believe that the more we contemplate our God and His ways he will enlighten us as he sees fit. Keep the Cross ever before you. Yes, keep the Cross before you and put the secular world behind you, and that's what I've been trying very hard to do this Lenten season. Focus, keep focused by attending Mass as often as possible and while there delve deep into the Mystery of the Mass, the mystery of the Eucharist. My Lord and my God! He is there when we call Him, we just have to call him without the heart of stone. Oh, this time of penance, this time of Passion! Lord, help me to learn about you more and more during this season of Lent, and to stay more fixed on that narrow path until my time on earth is through.


the booklady said...

Doing with less ... enduring ... trying to find quiet amid all the noise ... yes, it does sound like Lent. It may not seem like it, but I think He is favoring you with these 'opportunities' to walk His Way of the Cross. And yet, all the while, He is also walking YOUR way of the cross beside you too, carrying the weight and supporting you. Courage KAM. You are not alone.

God bless you for this post!

shadowlands said...

"Also, I'm finding that the noise of the world is unsettling at times"

I so agree with this statement. I try to control my environment, but on Sunday asked God to take over the day's timetable, in order for me, not to resent people calling on my time, which He gives me anyway.

Daily Grace said...

Listen, Oh Lord, to my prayer.
Listen to my desire to be with you, to dwell in your house, and to let my whole being be filled with your presence. But none of this is possible without you. When you are not the one that fills me, I am soon filled with endless thoughts and concerns that divide me and tear me away form you. Even thoughts about you, good spiritual thoughts, can be little more than a distraction when you are not the author.

Only you Lord……

Keep tending the field Kam, continue the path you are on. God is with you, he hears the prayers of your heart.

God Bless,