Putting up anything here has been nearly impossible lately due to time constraints, an avalanche of events that I'm still trying to digest and then write about and the effects of prednisone that I began taking for my spastic lungs which accompanied my bout with bronchitis. Yech!! I've been weirded out for the last 2 weeks but the weaning process began a few days ago, so hopefully I'll get back into better shape. One can't think straight on prednisone, so I figured I'd just absorb all incoming events and deal with posting later. I've made a major change in my life that has to do with taking on extra work (I'm not going to). In my feeling of importance in being the main supporter of our beautiful family I let my life get out of hand and ruled (in a way) by the almighty dollar. I forgot who was in charge, and needed to be smacked more than a couple of times last week to get it through my head. In feeling so damn important I lost sight of some basic goals, lost sight of the Franciscan Rule, and momentarily lost sight of Christ. When we are weak satan is strong, and once again I found that out. This time though Our Lord helped me to realize my mistake (I know it was Him, otherwise I'd still be ranting) and drove me that evening (Tues.) to confession. Thanks you, Lord, for being there, in the guise of a good Franciscan priest. Thanks for asking just the right question, for having me reflect on something else entirely, until you revealed the wisdom of your love.
Lord, why does it take us so long to let you lead us, let you lead me? And why can't I let myself go completely, to place all these burdens that I'm really starting to feel at your feet. Why do I insist on carrying everything and everyone around? These are my questions, Lord, to you this Lent. These are the questions I'll ask myself.