Thursday, June 18, 2009
I've seen other posts about this, but I didn't think I had the problem, but that's usually the first sign that you do have a problem. I have to admit I do daydream at times during The Rosary, morning or evening prayers, praying in general. I think I thought that that little bit of slipping away was normal, but it's not. And I think that's why I've been a bit unsatisfied with my prayer life, and not knowing why. "Pray constantly," it has been said. (ST. Paul.) But at work, in the shop, driving a car in heavy traffic, it's just not going to work. I think for me, the Rosary in the car, contemplative-type prayer while driving will just have to be as good as it turns out. I'm so used to doing it I don't think I could stop, and just listen to the radio. Yech! I'll allot a bit more time for formal prayer in private, or with H. This month has sort of torn me up, mentally, physically and spiritually. So much stuff has happened, worldly things that I try to separate myself from, but these events happen and they suck me in. I become part of them and I feel stretched.
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Mary saved my life, and brought me home to the Church of her Son. This I know. So I've enjoyed praying the rosary since my return, albeit like you, often with distractions. Only in the past two years it seems to be more easy. Mary's feelings, Jesus' feelings, and my feelings get kind of intermixed during the rosary, and it kind of unites all of us, my feeling with them, and I am confident them feeling with me.
I wrote down some "thought starters" for my rosary meditations. They are posted on my blog, should you be interested. I printed them out and left copies at the two adoration chapels I visit, and I can see they are getting good use. Perhaps God is using the words to speak to them, too. Last night, when I said the Sorrowful Mysteries and contemplated them, I knew God was very close.
I pray that He be close to you in your prayers, also. We all need consolations.
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