You are the light of the world.
A city seated on a mountain cannot be hid.
Neither do men light a candle and put it
under a bushel but upon a candlestick,
that it may shine to all
that are in the house. (Matthew 5)
That's from today's Gospel reading from the Traditional Latin Mass. I can only get there on Saturday mornings and Sunday at 12:00 noon and that's not enough, I know, but that's all the Masses I can make. Someday, if it's in His plan, I'll be able to go on the days when the TLM is available. Right now I'm where He wants me, which is still working for my bread. But even though He has left me there I will not be sad, will not put on the long face. I'm there to do His will, which is to love. To love. So hard! My fellow man, my co-workers! Yeow! But I do try, every day, although I fail at times quite miserably. But it's funny; by all my failures the Cross becomes much clearer, the path to and from the Cross at times almost materializes before my eyes. I call it the slow-down, the small gift of grace from God when He lets you see or feel the result of your action as He wants you to, not as you or the world sees it. For me it's never anything major, just a change in thought, it seems, just a new realization. I don't know, I get lost in words, sometimes, lost where there are no words to say. Move on, k, move on from this and let Him work.
Maybe, to sum up, it's for me, a matter of Him drawing and me reaching. Sounds simple, uh? Heck no! For the Holy Spirit, perhaps, but for me, no. I reach now from a place so different than before. We've peeled away the outer skin, stripping away the excess. No more cable t.v. A big one, that. Not just not watching the television, but turning the cable off completely. We are surviving, and quite well, thank you. No newspaper delivery. All these things, for us, just became obstructions to God. We (H and myself) needed more silence in our lives, and less distractions and all has gone well. We are also back in formation again, pursuing the call of the Third Order Franciscans. St. Francis' Rule of 1221 for the Third Order is just too sweet to not taste. God is so very, very good. He levels the road ahead for you, just so you can carry the Cross further for His Son. Blessed Virgin Mary and all the Saints, stay with me on the road, prop me up as I try to prop up, in my own sloppy way, my brothers and sisters here on earth.